Wednesday, September 28, 2011

The Truth

I have been pondering on this idea for a long time now, and finally decided, we all need it. After the very first time i ever got tested, getting the tests yearly became easier and easier. Now it's a walk in the park. Mind you the first time i got tested was less than 4 years ago. After i got married and just had a bran new baby. I had applied for Life Insurance and of course they tested me. I was always afraid of getting life insurance because of that test. Why? I don't know....but like many of you, i was very very nervous the first time. However, it is the best thing i have ever done. Ever. I'm sharing my story with you, because so many of us want to get tested but don't.

I invite you to this amazing
FREE workshop "The Truth" Saturday November 26 from 3pm- 6pm at The Cris Gibson Community Center (Brampton north of Queen on McLaughlin)

There will be guest speakers along with someone living with Hivto speak to us.

We need to get this word out there my friends. Everyone is so afraid to speak about it. Well, not me. Let's come together and discuss The Truth. Get your teens, friends and family out this day and join in on the "convo" bring your questions and comments and let's keep it real on November 26.

Please SHARE these flyers. Don't keep it to yourself. If you know anyone who is ACTIVE, they need to be there.

I want to see you there! This is for young women and men, however it is not limited to them, if you are older and don't consider yourself "young" please come. You need to hear this too.

To reserve your seat, please email me back with the amount of seats you will need. You have 2 months to take that day off :-)))

For some reason i can't seem to upload the flyer if you send me your email, i will send it to you.

Monday, September 26, 2011

Read Your Manual

What a weekend....what a weekend....

Ok, so you know how we all get car manuals when we purchase a car? I have had my Audi for about 6 years. I don't owe anything on it, but i feel like i do...with all the money i have put into fixing it. It got hit a couple of weeks ago and the damage cost was $1,400 which was cool because it was the drivers fault and he chose not to go through insurance. That was fine with me, except i was without a car for a week. My son told me when he was driving the car on the weekend the "coolant" sign kept popping up and advised me to make sure i got a bottle of coolant. As i was about to take Captain skating yesterday and driving with my foster son as well, i saw smoke coming from the hood. I tell you, my God is amazing...i was turning into Canadian Tire at that exact time to buy the coolant. The mechanic knocked on my window and when i rolled it down he said, " have a leakage under your car and its making a funny noise...." I thought to myself "noooo really?" But i did not want tot be rude.

Make a long story short, it was my timing belt. yuppp that's right/. So this means about $800 later i will have my car back. Plus i had to pay $100 to have it towed because Canadian Tire will charge me about $1,200 to fix it and they are not professionals in my eyes. My mechanic who works at Audi part time and also has his own shop, has been working on my car for about 2 years and he is amazing.

I called him crying yesterday and he has never seen me like that. He got so worried and assured me it's not the end of the world and reminded me that "I MUST READ MY MANUAL or at least look at it ever few months" okaay okaay.......i thought...

Anyway when i looked in the manual and read the section on coolant and etc (i don't know much about cars, except how to drive it and a few other minor things) i noticed it said that after a certain amount of kil on the car, to check the timing belt and this and that....I think i have looked in that manual about 3 times in 6 years. Yiikesss...that is terrible.

Ladies, please do not wait until your car breaks down before you take it to a shop. Get it checked out every 4 to six months just for the hell of it. Taking the bus is fun (more so for Captain) but my ohhh my i don't realize how much i love my baby until it's gone)


Tuesday, September 20, 2011

It's NOT Worth it!

Ok i feel a lot better now but this morning i was a HOT mess. If there is one thing i can't stand is "angry drivers."
I'm sure many of you can relate. You know like the ones that just won't let you in their lane and the more or longer you sit there with your signal on the more they drive up. Yes those ones!!!!!!

I hope the person who did this to me today is reading this. The funniest thing is when you drive down about 3 or 4 lights and guess who is stopped at the same red light with you??? YES! She/He is. Now aint that funny! (lol) They were in such a rush speeding down like road runner but they got NOWHERE!

It's just not worth it. I mean you wont get to where you are going any faster...ok you may save yourself about 3 minutes...if that. But more than likely you will be there at the same time if you didn't cut me off. Above all SAFETY!!!!!!! Please. If you don't care about your life, care for others.

Besides this, read the newspaper or turn on the TV to news and listen to how many accidents are caused by IGNORANCE. My car got hit by a driver in a hurry 2 weeks ago and he was out $1000 cash because he did not want to go through his insurance. His car was totaled. I mean, it's just not worth it.

Don't ever loose your "driving class" rules. Look through all mirrors at least every 5 minutes. Never turn without looking in your blind spots and above all, let someone by. If they are asking you to let them in, LET THEM! What will you loose if you don't???

Sorry had to get that off my  chest. A smile goes a long way. It is just not worth it!!!!!

Thursday, September 15, 2011

Stop!!!!! Take A Break!

Ok we all know what it feels like to have too much on your plate. I know i do.

This summer i had to seriously take a break. I was doing way more than i can handle. I don't know how i still had time for "me" not much but i did. Most of us go without a substantial amount of sleep on a regular basis; and between our lack of energy from poor sleeping habits, and our hectic lifestyles, we often feel like we're pushing ourselves or dragging as we go through our days at home, at work, and with our kids. If you're like me, you probably feel like sleep or pampering should be placed at the bottom of your "to do" list and at the end of each month....which never happens because your mind goes into overdrive at the end of each month. There just isn't enough hours in the day to spend too much of it in bed. And, you, like many others, might feel that admitting you're not getting enough sleep or allowing yourself a quick nap during the day is a sign of weakness. Instead of sleeping more, you might turn to medications that give you a quick pick me up, or coffee and candy to get you going.

Look, coffee does not fix anything. I quit drinking it (although i only had one a day) about 3 months ago. Cold turkey. When i started "hot yoga" i realized what it was doing to me and QUIT! If you want to know, research it or maybe i can make that next weeks blog :-)

What worked for me was to write down my top 5 priorities. My kids, my job, completing my book, and me. When i say "me" i mean my social life, my physical health, getting into shape mentally, my family etc
I took a break this summer and focused on those top 3 things. I was the woman who worked 5 jobs and wore many hats. But not anymore. I finally finished my book that i had been writing for 4 years ONLY because i had time this summer to do so.

STOP and take a look at what matters in your life. What's important? Write down what you would like to see take place in the next 5 years. Where do you see yourself? Then start from there.

But whatever you do RELAX and laugh with your kids. Stop rushing. They know when were doing that...and another thing, get off the phone when their around. They don't like it. Unless it is a business or emergency matter. Especially for the young ones.


Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Get Tested!

I remember growing up and being so afraid to get tested for HIV! My friends and i would talk about it but no one had the guts to go and do it. So i went so many years without doing one. But in the back of my mind, despite if i had been with one partner or 10, i could not stop thinking about it. My first boyfriend cheated every week with a different girl. I grew up in the hood (Bleecker St) and then, it was norm. There were times where i went in for my yearly physical and was so tempted to have one so i said to myself, "ok if they offer it to me, then i will do it." But can you believe none but ONE doctor ever said anything about getting tested. Awful huh?

Finally after i got married, my husband and i decided to get life insurance and that was the FIRST time ever i got tested. I even told him i was very nervous and scared  to get the policy because of the Aids test. He was so relaxed and cool about it even tho he had reason not to be. However, he got tested yearly. So it was a walk in the park for him. Me, on the other hand, i was a mess for two weeks while waiting for the results. Of course it was negative but the wait alone was like dying slowly. There are thousands of women in the states who get infected by their "gay" husbands and they have only slept with ONE it has nothing to do with the amount of partners you have been with. Everyone is at risk. Unless you were both virgins, then ok. Otherwise, one is too many and reason even to get tested.

Since then i have been tested every year. It is the MOST LIFE CHANGING thing you can ever do. If you are married, then this is not really for you because hopefully your husband or wife will be the last but if your not, and you take this test and the results are NEGATIVE, i promise you this, you will NEVER be intimate with another man unless he also gets tested. Even with protection. It is just the affect this "test" has on you. All the women i know that have been tested DO NOT sleep around with men. They are very cautious and do not take chances. However there are those women who have never been tested and sleep around a lot. Whether they are in the church or in the world. Makes no difference. This test is one of the bestthings you will ever do.

Years ago too many people did not take it because the waiting period is too long and for that entire time they waited, they are sick. I have one friend who puked everyday waiting for the results. But today, you can take this test and get the results in 5 MINUTES!!!! Please go to this website and find a location near you and give yourself what you deserve, FREEDOM!!!!!!
Get Tested Here
These clinics are located throughout York Region and provide the following services in a non-judgmental and confidential environment:. Please visit them today.

Also look out for the workshop i will be doing in November on this topic. I will have special guest speakers and life changing topics. I will keep you posted.

I love you all and hope to be blogging with you in 50 years :-)))

Wednesday, September 7, 2011

Girls In Canada!

As many of us know i have always had a passion for working with and mentoring young women. Much of this comes from my background as a child and what i survived. Being a young woman in today's society is not easy. We face so many tests and challenges which leave us feeling either less than or not worthy at all. It usually starts at the age of 9. Despite what you're or our parents want to believe, at times they don't even know what we/you/they are going through. I is a tough world out here. This is why i suggest every young woman READ! Study the "stats" and what is going on in this world we live in. Read about relationships and the do's and don't's of LIFE. Know what it is like to understand "abuse" and all the forms it comes in. Mental, physical, emotional and sexual. This is so important ladies.

Please have someone you can talk too. Unlike myself, i did not have anyone. I had a social worker, but i did not trust her. I had a big sister but i did not trust her either (not my blood sister) But none of that was their fault. I was just a messed up child and did not trust anyone. But we have got to get passed that and reach out to someone. If you have something you want to share with someone, something that is going on that you know should not be, please reach out.

I was doing some reading and researching online tonight and came across an amazing article. Please read this. Please. Like i said, study the world around you...and this is a way to do that.

Why do you focus on girls when most media reports say boys are falling behind?
  • We strongly believe that all children—boys and girls—deserve to thrive, and we applaud other campaigns that work to support boys. As a women’s organization, our mission focuses on women and girls. However, our teen violence prevention programs are co-ed, designed for both boys and girls.
  • When girls start school, it’s true they are more likely than boys to do well in reading, writing, and forming friendships. Yet for many girls, this advantage is overshadowed by two serious problems—high rates of sexual assault and a sharp decline in mental health in adolescence.
  • Aboriginal girls in Canada are especially at risk. They experience alarmingly high levels of depression, suicide, addiction, HIV infection, and poverty.
  • We are also very concerned about the growing number of girls who are being victimized by sex trafficking. About 80% of sex trafficking victims in Canada are women and girls. 1
How many girls in Canada are sexually assaulted?
  • In 2008, over 11,000 sexual assaults of girls under the age of 18 were reported to police in Canada. Since only about 10% of assaults are reported, the actual number is much higher. 
  • Girls experience sexual assault at much higher rates than boys—82% of all victims under the age of 18 are female. 
  • The highest risk is for teenage girls between the ages of 13 and 15. At this age, girls are much more likely to be sexually assaulted than young women aged 18 to 24.
  • When girls are sexually assaulted, 75% of the time the perpetrator is someone they know. 
  • One third are victimized by a family member. Ninety-seven percent of the perpetrators are male—a father, brother, grandfather, uncle, cousin, or step-relative. 
  • Girls are four times as likely as boys to be sexually assaulted by a family member.
  • Tragically, about 75% of Aboriginal girls under age 18 have been sexually abused.
  • Almost half of all Ontario high school girls have been the victim of unwanted sexual comments or gestures. 
  • Over 80% of victims of dating violence are female. 
What happens to girls’ mental health in adolescence?
  • As girls enter adolescence, from ages 9 to 13, their confidence declines sharply and they experience higher rates of depression.
  • In Grade Six, 36% of girls say they are self-confident, but by Grade Ten this has plummeted to only 14%.
  • In Grade Six, boys and girls report the same levels of depression—about 25% says they feel depressed at least once a week.  However, by Grade Ten rates of depression in girls have jumped—they are three times more likely than boys to be depressed.  For girls, depression typically stems from “low self-esteem, negative body image, feelings of helplessness and hopelessness, and stress.”
  • More than 20% of BC girls say they have deliberately cut or harmed themselves. 
  • More than half of all girls wish they were someone else. 
Please read more on this article.... 

Monday, September 5, 2011

Is You Child Refusing To Sleep At Night?

I had an amazing weekend and did not even think to log into the computer to check my email. I usually do this in the summers. However, this morning i logged in and checked my 152 emails (from 4 days worth) and read an email in regards to my toddler sleeping at night. It was very interesting and i would like to share it with you.

If you would like to sign up for their newsletter, please do so at Baby Center

Why preschoolers resist bedtime
If you're like most parents, you're all too familiar with this scenario: you put your child to bed at 7.30pm, hugging and kissing her and wishing her sweet dreams. It's been a long day, but still you've got washing-up to do, you have bills to pay, the cat needs to be fed, and you haven't had a spare moment to put your feet up. But instead of spending the rest of the evening catching up on your chores and spending some precious time winding down for the night, you're in and out of your child's room, cajoling her to sleep. She finally nods off – about three hours after she first went to bed.

Take heart: bedtime can be tough for a preschooler. On the one hand, she's learning to assert herself and her new found independence (hence the jack-in-the-box action on her bed). On the other hand, she's fearful of what it means to be on her own. Fighting sleep is a way to take control, but it's also a way to stave off fears that come with the night. Monsters under the bed, boogiemen in the closet, thunderstorms, creepy crawlies – those are pretty scary things to deal with when you're all alone in the dark! And even if she’s not scared, sleep can seem very boring to a preschooler compared to the excitement of the day.

What you can do about bedtime battles

Set aside some time to talk to your child about her day
Your preschooler may be fighting sleep simply because she needs to spend some time with you at the end of her day. Especially if you work long hours yourself, allot some time before bed to chat with her about goings-on at daycare and to find out the latest dramas in her social life. You may find that she's more amenable to sleep if she's had a chance to unburden herself.

Stick to a bedtime routine
Make a pictorial chart for your child to follow – including her bath, teeth brushing, bedtime story and goodnight kiss. Also include her usual (and reasonable) requests – like that second sip of water or a peek at the moon. Give her some notice before it's time to start the routine each night ("Sophie, five minutes before bath time!"). Try not to let her dawdle, or drag things out with activities that aren't part of the ritual – no third glass of water, for instance.

Motivate her
When your child goes to bed on time, the rewards for you are obvious. Make it clear what's in it for her too. The morning after she sticks with the routine, praise her and give her a sticker to put on a special chart. Offer her a reward – like a new book or a visit to her favourite playground – once she stays in bed three nights in a row. (Start small – for a preschooler, a few days is a long time to hang in there!)

Offer choices
Refusing to go to bed is a powerful way for your child to assert herself. So it might help to find an acceptable means of allowing her to be assertive. Let her decide whether she wants to hear some poems or a story before lights-out, for instance, or ask her if she'd like a sip of water before or after she climbs into bed. Be careful to offer only choices you can live with; if you ask "Want to go to bed now?" you probably won't like the answer you get.

Be calm but firm
Even if your youngster cries or pleads for an exception to the going-to-bed rule, stand your ground. If you're frustrated, don't engage in a power struggle. Speak calmly and quietly but insist that when time's up, time's up. If you give in to her request for "five more minutes, please," you'll only hear it again tomorrow night.

Friday, September 2, 2011

I Was Doing So Good.......Until....

So i have been so proud of myself lately for NOT attacking my nails.

My girl Tamara, introduced me to a product called "Nutra Nails" and let me be the one to tell you that her and i KNOW what is good from garbage when it comes to nail treatment. We use to use this product called "Grow 10" the only one on the shelves that was proven to work 100% They discontinued it about 2 years ago and since then, her and i have struggled to get a good product. Well, at least one like that one.

One day Tamara called me and said, "Liz i wanted to test this out before i told you to go buy it but guurrrlll you have got to get is 10 times better than Grow's called Nutra Nail..." "ok come on now ma, you know aint nuthin betta than Grow 10 hahahah" i laughed.

Well, let me PLEASE tell you here ......IT IS AMAZING!!!!!! I mean if you break a nail, within 5 days you will see a HUGE difference. I mean this y'all.

Recently i had two nails is the first time since i have been using this product. I don't have gel or acrylic or any sort of anything on my nails. The are ALLLLL NATURAL! However, when those two nails broke, i had no choice but to file them down pretty short. I was so sad. I had a pity party all by myself in my room for a whole day.

I'm still not over it......but i will soon.

Okay now, hurry up and go get this polish. You will thank me ....soon. If you are a biter or nibbler, go buy it. You will be hooked on this. Between that and my cuticle oil, i don't which one i love more.

A big SHOUT OUT to my bestest friend Tamara. Honey i wish we would have founf this when we were 14 years old running around like "crazy chicks" lol.....or when we had to jump that fence by "the park" after getting caught stealing. Well "i got caught" lol lol Love you ma.