Tuesday, June 21, 2016

Don't Forget the Woman Behind the Mother!

I can speak about this because there was a time in my life where I got so busy being a mother and a wife that I forgot to BE a woman. 

Too many wives and mothers are caught in this trap and it's disturbing to know and see this because the reason we become mothers and wives is because we can do and BE it. I know one thing for sure is that God never gave us those blessings to wear or tear us down. In order to BE an amazing wife and DO all that it takes to BE a mother, you've got to fill up your gas tank on a daily basis. It needs to be filled with gas / fuel. And that fuel called SEL-LOVE. 

Eating healthy, exercising, getting at least 7 hours of sleep (or more), building healthy relationships, spending quality time with friends, having hobbies, laughing a LOT, feeding your mind with positive reads, spending quality time alone, enjoying the water while it beats on your skin in the shower, having a prayer life, setting goals and watch them unfold, living with passion DAILY, have boundaries, attend self-development workshops and conferences, invest in your own education and dreams...if we cannot do and BE these things than we are nowhere near ready to become mothers and wives and if you already are one than it is NOT TOO LATE ladies!

I do not claim to know all things, but one thing I know for sure from experience and working with girls and women on a daily basis is that if you do not invest in yourself mentally, emotionally, physically and spiritually, you WILL crash!!! 

Come on woman get up and do something today!!!!

For no other reason but because YOU DESERVE TO LIVE!!!!

Join us July 9th at the 'Healthy Me' Networking Event as Kiesha Francis speaks on Self-Love branding. Whether you're a mother, wife, entrepreneur, new in business, and employee or a boss, you don't want to miss this! 
For more information, please email us at shecanbookings@gmail.com

Thursday, June 9, 2016

Planning to Win- The Importance of a Life Coach

The majority of the population has no idea what life coaches do. Not only that, but they have no idea what kind of person would hire a life coach. 
So, here’s some types of people who could use some coaching:

1. You’re stuck. So, you have this decision to make. Either to get married, leave your crappy relationship, change careers, make a geographical change or go after that big, badass dream of yours. Anything. You’re confused with the voices in your head. The one that tells you it’s too risky vs. the one that says “go for it!” You’re swimming with thoughts of “what if I do it and it doesn’t work” vs “what if I don’t do it and I regret it”. And you want a guarantee of the outcome.
A life coach will look at her magic 8 ball and tell you the answer.

Not really. A life coach will help you dig underneath the thoughts and feelings of “what if’s”, help you discover what’s important to you about this decision, and explore those voices. Which one is the scared and playing-it-safe inner-critic and which one is your bedazzling inner intuitive voice. A life coach won’t make the decision for you, but help you clarify and sort it all out.

2. You’re lost. Maybe you don’t know what your “thing” is. Maybe you don’t love your job, or you feel like you’re living your life like a sloth on auto-pilot (did you know there is such a thing?). Maybe you just got out of college and don’t love the field you studied in. Or, your routine as a parent/spouse is leaving you unfulfilled. And don’t get me started on the guilt you feel about this.

Rest assured you are totally normal and there are boatloads of people just like you. I believe everyone is lost before a big breakthrough.

A life coach will help you sort out what your true personal values are (you may have NO idea, or may think that your values are what you inherited from your family or other institution) and when you discover those, you can get clear on what is important to you. That way you can decide how you want to honor those values and a really awesome side-effect is you being fulfilled. Imagine that!
3. You’re unhappy. If you’re unhappy, you need a change. Or you need to change. Or maybe you just had a breakdown. Or you’re about to lose your damn mind.

Either way, a life coach can help you through this. Your coach will help you pinpoint why you’re unhappy (many times you think it’s one thing, and it’s another) and help you make changes. This also goes back to your values. The majority of the time, people that are unhappy aren’t living their personal values, and the values that are true to them are being stepped on or suffocated.

Example: You don’t love your job. Or even if it’s your job as a stay-at-home-mom. What’s making you unhappy isn’t your boss or your kids. Somewhere inside of you might be a value around freedom. Or purpose driven work. Or creativity. And if you’re not getting it, your soul and spirit will suffer.

4. You’re happy. So, why would someone need a life coach if they’re already happy? It’s the perfect time for a life coach. When you’re happy, and you love where you are, you’re more likely to be open to growth. You’re more likely to wonder what else is out there for you to reach out and grab and be more willing to do the work. I’ve met many people that are unhappy that are willing to do the work as well, but being happy can be a great motivator as well.

5. You just got out of a relationship. You’re brokenhearted, or maybe not-so-much. Either way, you’re starting over. And that’s a beautiful place to be. You have every reason to be excited about beginning again on your terms.
But, what are your terms?

You might not know. Working with a life coach will help you clarify what you want, why it’s important to you, what’s possible for you (hint: everything), and how you can get it. You can brainstorm, strategize, explore and clarify. (And for some clarity on why your relationships might be failing, click here).

6. You’re comfortable. You have your routine. Your comfort zone. It starts here and it ends there. Any variation of it and you squirm. We’ve all been there. It might be one part of your life, or it might be all parts of your life. And yes, life should be comfortable, but are you having FUN? And some kind of excitement?

Coaching will invite you, hold your hand and push you to step out of your comfort zone. A coach will challenge you to make new magic this way.

7. You’re scared. Let’s face it: We’re all scared. We’re afraid of the dark, afraid of looking stupid, afraid of failure, afraid of success, afraid of what people will think, afraid of what they’ll say, afraid of being alone, afraid of being seen, afraid of not being seen, afraid of leaving a relationship,

A life coach will hold the space for you to name your fears, give you tools to take action despite them, and change the way you look and feel about your fears. You’ll still have fears, you’ll just be able to stand up to them with more courage.

8. You’re done with therapy and thinking, “Now what?”. Therapy and coaching can make a great marriage together and life coaching after therapy can be a perfect self-discovery journey. Many therapists cross over into life coaching, and if you find someone that does that for you, great. But, if you feel your relationship with your therapist has run its course, finding a life coach that will help you with your “now what?” inquiry may be just what you need.

Therapy will help you uncover and heal your issues from the past. This is essential for being able to forgive and move past hurtful experiences. Life coaches generally don’t need to know your stories of your past. We’re interested in where you are now and where you want to go. We generally coach people who are of sound mind and who are well mentally and emotionally.
One thing is true about all of these things. No matter what you feel, you are not broken, nor do you “fixing”. You are naturally creative, resourceful and whole when it comes to you and your life. And a life coach can help you tap into that.

Also, life coaches aren’t magic bullets, or magic pills. The solution always resides inside of you, but many times we are so fearful, we can’t hear or see it. Coaching can help you look at any situation from a different perspective to get you out of that paralyzing fear.

My hope for you and all people is that when they are ready, they get a coach. You don’t have to spend your life savings on one, there are ways to get coaching inexpensively. All coaches have different styles. Do your research, listen to your heart and find the right one for you.